LEA HOPE BECKER 

I was a naive college dropout with two divorces under my belt, three kids to raise and almost no money in the bank. Even I wouldn’t have bet on me to turn my life around. I’m still puzzled as to whether I was driven by anger, competitiveness or simply a will to overcome my many obstacles. Probably it was a combination of all three. I do recall that when I felt like crying I had to pretend that a joke was being played on me and that I had to turn the tables on my adversary — whoever or whatever it was. I wanted things my mother never dared to wish for and I wanted my path to happiness to be laden with goodies. A higher education was to be the key to my future, for I was a second generation child of an aspiring American family.

What meaning would you give to the phrase “Having it all” as it relates to a woman’s life? As for me, I have generally embraced my own favorite categories of success, although not always in the order that made sense, because I frequently did things backwards! My “Big Five” were: 1) Marriage, (2) Children, (3) Career, (4) Financial security; and (5) Good health. People told me I was out of my mind to think I could work full-time, go to school full-time and run a household as a single parent with three young children. I told my dissenters that I had everything under control! Sure I did, like kids always obey, money always comes in and employers fall at an educated woman’s feet. I had some control of my situation, but was naive as to my future difficulties.

Eventually, I learned that worthwhile marriages are often elusive; the bearing and successful rearing of children isn’t a guarantee; a full-fledged career competes with the first two; financial security can escape in a heartbeat as external events occur; and the enjoyment of good health is often a roll of the dice. The joker is always out there to gum up one’s plans. Nevertheless, I have concluded that the secret of life success is embodied in the devoted pursuit of one’s dreams — it is the odyssey itself. If one cannot enjoy the trip, then what’s the purpose of beginning the ride? That is what this book is about.